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Posts Tagged ‘Album Sales

Quick Hits: Day26 – Day26

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So typically we use the “Quick Hits” format for newly acquired music that we like and feel like sharing with others or just generally talking about. But I need to flip the script a little bit, even if only just for today.

I’ve written extensively about artists that I like — or at least whose music I find to be new or interesting or meaningful — in almost every post thus far. I didn’t want to contribute too much to the ever-snarky “this sucks” culture of today, which seems particularly prominent when it comes to blog culture. But I gotta say something about Day26 and their debut album, the cleverly titled, Day26:

This sucks.

I mean honestly, this was supposed to be the next R&B super-group, which Diddy (whom I grew up with, like, and admire) and MTV spent years crafting — holding auditions all over the country and synthesizing the thousands of hopefuls and wannabes into the five men you see sitting before you who already look dressed for their own funeral. And yet, I found myself listening to the album and thinking, Seriously? This is it? This is the best Diddy could come up with? With all of America as his talent pool. And on top of all that, Diddy, you decide to saddle them with this absurd name, Day26 (no spaces, please). Why, man, why?

I was really looking forward to having a good, old-school, all-male R&B group that could really sing again. Well you can forget that idea. If you were waitin’, it ain’t here yet. Forget about the next New Edition, the next Jodeci, or the next Boyz II Men. Day26 is maybe the next All-4-One — maybe (come on, “I Swear” was a great song) — but they aren’t even the next 112. (Who had some really legitimate shit, by the way: “Only You,” “Cupid,” “It’s Over Now,” “Peaches & Cream,” “Dance With Me,” etc.). The passion and charisma just isn’t there with these dudes.

And the bitch of it is, Day26 has probably had more advantages in releasing their first album than any group in R&B history, accept for maybe Diddy’s other “Making the” band, female “super-group,” Danity Kane. Between the insane amount of near-constant publicity from four seasons of MTV’s Making the Band show, and album production almost exclusively by top-flight producers (Bryan-Michael Cox, Danja, and The Hitmen), it’s no wonder that Day26 debuted at number one on the Billboard 200 chart — anything less would have been serious under achievement considering the coattails on which they’re riding.

Despite the hot initial album sales, the group’s first single, “Got Me Going,” hasn’t exactly been a smashing success, peaking at number seventy-nine on Billboard’s Hot 100, and number thirty on the Hot R&B/Hip Hop chart. This could be due to the fact that, like the group itself, the song is just pretty damn lame. It seems entirely possible that what Day26 is truly suffering from is over-design, over-production, over-coaching, and over-exposure. In other words, the build up was so extreme, there was simply no way the ends could justify the means.

If you opt to check out any Day26 tracks, I’d go with “I’m The Reason,” a percussion-driven joint reminiscent of Destiny’s Child’s “Lose My Breath,” or “Since You’ve Been Gone,” an unsatisfying attempt at the standard “Oh baby I miss you so much but now I’ve changed” R&B ballad.

But I don’t particularly recommend it.

– Jonathan

Day26 Official MySpace

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The Friday Writers’ Bloc: May 9th, 2008

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Download this week’s Friday Writers’ Bloc Playlist HERE

Michael-Bradley’s Picks

1. Minutemen – Corona

Sound familiar? Welcome to the Minutemen. My generation probably knows them better for this intro riff – the Jackass theme song. I still have trouble not hearing after the first few seconds, Hi I’m Johnny Knoxville and I’m about to….[do something stupid]. Associations with Jackass aside though, the Minutemen were really a magnificent band. Straight out of San Pedro they quickly caught the eyes of local LA hardcore punk acts like Black Flag. Even though their sound was totally different and unique, their politics really fell in line with the more politically aware people in hardcore. Greg Ginn of Black Flag signed them to their first album to his Label SST. This would be only the 2nd SST release, following Black Flag’s first release, the Nervous Breakdown EP. They toured rigorously with Black Flag and other punk bands, frequently being misunderstood by stubborn punks. Even though these guys weren’t thrash, they had just as much fire as any other punks out there. Their leftist politics, and sincere push for D.I.Y. left a fine mark on the punk scene. This song, Corona, off their 2nd to last LP, Double Nickels on the Dime- iswhere I think they really hit their groove. Singer and guitarist D. Boon died in a car crash a year after this seminal release, abruptly ending this truly amazing band. (Anyone remotely interested in this band should see the documentary “We Jam Econo”)

2. Fugazi – Shut the Door

Speaking of D.I.Y……Here’s Fugazi. Ian MacKaye’s [Lead man of DC Hardcore band Minor Threat] post-hardcore band. Formed in 1987, Hardcore had dwindled away for the past 3 or so years. Fugazi also were really known for their politics. Their ethics were punk to the core. They never sold Merch, and never played any shows for more than $10. They strived for $5 though. They were also strongly opposed to violent behavior at shows. Hardcore was dead, and slam-dancing had to be phased out. They were also known for their Straight Edge way of life (MacKeye inventing it with Minor Threat’s song Straight Edge). An interesting note about Fugazi is that they are looked at as one of the creators of Emo. But this was before Emo was what it is today. There was no eyeliner, and wrist cutting. Emo was simply a term for Emotional Hardcore. This is clearly that. How somehow Emo has become recontextualized into Cure fans with a love for pop melodrama and a crying fetish is beyond me. I don’t see how it happened. Shut the door on that!

3. Rage Against the Machine – Settle For Nothing

Always spending so much time looking for politically inspired music in the past, I sometimes forget that one of the most intensely political bands played during my time! These guys were amazing. It’s even more amazing to think how angry they were during a seemingly benign political time considering the times that surrounded their two most important releases in ’92 and ’96. To think of these guys playing new material now, a riot would surely break out. But a lot of their lyrics dealt with socio-economic problems that haven’t changed all that much. Though I can’t relate to these lyrics to my life directly, I understand the story and it is motivating enough to enrage anyone: “A jail cell is freedom from the pain in my home—Hatred passed on, passed on and passed on—A world of violent rage—But its one that I can recognize—Having never seen the color of my fathers eyes—……..To escape from the pain in an existence mundane—I gotta 9, a sign, a set and now I gotta name—Read my writing on the wall—No-ones here to catch me when I fall.”

Jonathan’s Picks

1. I Got My – Lil Wayne Feat. Static Major

This song is both totally straightforward and intensely complicated at the same time. It’s straightforward because, simply put, “I Got My” has been able to hold the top spot on my current list of favorite songs for a few months now. And that’s a seriously long time for me — I’m generally much more of a slut when it comes to finding and playing new favorite songs. I fall in love with a new one every day. But for some reason “I Got My” has just stuck with me and won’t let go. I think you’ll understand when you hear the way the beat fluidly hops around and how Lil Wayne deftly stays with it, and the way the song just escalates into the amazingly catchy and simple synth-driven chorus. Unfortunately, however, “I Got My” is complicated for two rather big reasons: after being one of the most highly anticipated albums of 2007 (it was set to release in December), the release date of Lil Wayne’s Tha Carter III was pushed back to June of 2008 following a massive song leak last year that included many tracks that had been recorded as part of his new album. “I Got My” may have been one of those songs, and it is uncertain whether or not it will make the final cut on Tha Carter III. The second reason is far more grave. Static Major (né Stephen Garrett), a highly regarded singer, songwriter (with multiple number one hits), and producer, died in February under tragic and suspicious circumstances — of either a brain aneurysm or the loss of blood during a medical procedure gone wrong (depending on whom you talk to). Though the extent of Static’s role in “I Got My” remains unclear (writer, producer, vocalist?), it’s certainly one of the last tracks he worked on. I hope to see it on Lil Wayne’s album this June, though it’s far from confirmed. Enjoy this one.

2. Lollipop (Remix) – Lil Wayne Feat. Gabriel Antonio

Speaking of Static Major, he is also featured prominently on the original release of “Lollipop,” the first single of Lil Wayne’s Tha Carter III. Sadly, Static died just weeks before the song’s official release. “Lollipop” would eventually top the Billboard Hot 100 chart, and Static Major can be still be seen in the song’s accompanying music video. This sentimentality, however, is not why I chose the remix of “Lollipop,” which basically substitutes Static Major for Gabriel Antonio, a rising R&B/Hip Hop artist out of Florida. Frankly, I don’t love the original version of the song, nor do I love the remix — as Lil Wayne said, “Dudes are gonna hate this one…..ugly dudes, that is.” Now, I love Lil Wayne, and it’s certainly not that I’m calling myself ugly — far too vain for that — but this just ain’t exactly a record for the fellas. This is the song that’s supposed to be radio and club-friendly, in order to drum up excitement and sales for Tha Carter III album as a whole. But what I find interesting about the “Lollipop” remix, and the reason I selected it for today’s picks, is that Lil Wayne utilizes Auto-Tune vocal processor (you its sound know first from Cher’s “Believe,” then from every T-Pain song ever, and most recently Snoop Dogg’s “Sexual Eruption”) throughout his vocals on entire song — not just in the chorus. So, in other words, he actually raps using Auto-Tune to distort and digitize his voice, something not yet done by rappers. And now, the trend is starting to catch on: just a few days ago I got a copy of Young Jeezy’s new single “Put On,” which features an extremely tight verse from Kanye West, with Kanye doing his entire verse using Auto-Tune. So now you know it’s officially happening, and we’ll have to keep an eye out to see if other rappers start following the trend set by industry leaders like Lil Wayne and Kanye.

3. Santogold – You’ll Find a Way (Switch vs. Sinden Remix)

It’s not hard to see why Santogold has been hailed as “the next M.I.A.” for the last…..well, I don’t even know how long it’s been. But a long-ass time. Santogold, aka Santi White, is different. Like M.I.A. she’s brown-skinned, sure, but also eschews making anything close to conventional hip hip or R&B music purposely, instead keeping things genre-eclectic and influence-global. Her much-awaited, eponymous first album was released on April 29th, 2008, and it does not disappoint, with an excellent mix of rock, electro, punk, dub reggae, and 80s influences on display throughout the twelve track album. My favorite track, the album’s finale, is a remix of one of her more dub punk efforts, “You’ll Find a Way.” The remix is kind of a minimalist — or maybe sparse is a better word — electro-reggae banger (it would absolutely kill on the dance floor in the right club with the right clientèle) that showcases Santogold’s incredibly unique and powerful voice, switching back and forth from her near-screaming to a sensual and almost casual stage whisper. It’s an extra-unique track from already unique and talented artist. And check out the hot album cover too. Keep your eyes on this one, she’s musically frisky.

JustJake’s Picks

1. Bill Monroe – Rawhide

Ok, it’s been long enough; time for an all-bluegrass picks. At the heart of bluegrass music lies the fiddle tune, they are the lifeblood and the soul of the music. Most of them are real old-timey songs whose origins lie beyond common memory. Nonetheless, everyone knows them and everyone plays them. Fiddle tunes don’t always feature the fiddle but rather the group of instruments as they trade solos. This one features Monroe’s mandolin and his superior skills come in clear as day.

2. Chris Thile – Salt Creek

Chris Thile is possibly the top mandolin player in the country at the moment. Not yet thirty, he has found acclaim since he was in elementary school. Best known for his work with the band Nickel Creek (which broke up recently), Thile has been doing solo work for some time now. This song is a traditional fiddle tune and, compared to either of the previous tunes, it’s plain to see how Thile stretches the bluegrass genre. You can still hear the song’s celtic roots and driving force but it quickly turns into something much jazzier and bluesy. This is about the best that newgrass (the more modern/less traditional bluegrass) has to offer. Enjoy.

Download this week’s Friday Writers’ Bloc Playlist HERE

Sam Sparro – Complex or Confused? (Part II of II)

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(If you haven’t read last week’s post, “Sam Sparro – Complex or Confused? Part I of II,” click here to backtrack to it before reading Part II below).

First let me start by apologizing for taking so long to get you guys Part II of the Sam Sparro story.

Frankly, I blame the drugs.

(And Hillary Clinton).

That being said, buckle up for the longest post of all time. But I’m throwing in links to all the songs, as well as a few pictures to make up for it. Okay, here we go………

So I realize that giving up Sparro’s excellent first single, “Black and Gold,” as an introduction to his music is a little like having sex on the first date — I gave up the goods without making you work for them. But as is often the case after people have sex on the first date, I wasn’t merely placated or satisfied by hearing “Black and Gold,” rather my appetite was whetted, and I was left wanting more. (Um, more Sam Sparro, that is). If anything, “Black and Gold” succeeded in roping me into the house of mirrors that is Sam Sparro. Now, I was trapped.

But how does the rest of his first album hold up in comparison to its lead single? Does it pale or do the other tracks back it up? Exactly what kind of music does this kid make anyway? And what of the God references? Was “Black and Gold” a one shot deal that just happened to be about Sparro’s search for God? Or would I discover the world’s first “Electro-soul spoof-disco-pop mixed with religious-funk-house” album, with lyrics wrought with religious references and questions at every turn? Because while I like to consider myself as having an eclectic and wide-ranging musical taste — and with apologies to the elder Mr. Falson — Christian Rock just isn’t among my preferred genres, nor do I plan on making it one.

Well the truth is, Sparro’s self-titled album is, not surprisingly, much like he is — it’s a true reflection of himself. Not an exact reflection, that isn’t what I mean. But an honest reflection, a real one. Shrouded in mixed signals yet entirely open to interpretation. Questioning, yes, but only in his authoritative and ever-urgent voice. Bouncing from one genre to another, with only ambiguous connections in between. Serious and introspective in one moment, then bubbly and ridiculous in the next. A God-fearing man of faith who also happens to smoke mad weed. Maybe. Who hides his pain behind fun, friendly, and sometimes silly dance tracks. In other words, Sam Sparro the album and Sam Sparro the man are both, well…..consistently inconsistent. Complex and confusing. Unsurprisingly surprising. (Now how’s that for confusion?)

But that isn’t to say there’s no meat left on the album’s bones after “Black and Gold.” True, it is quite easily the best track on Sparro’s album — I’ll tell you that right up front. But that’s largely due to its accessibility. The track just somehow works, and you don’t even have to think about why. And though three different listeners might put “Black and Gold” in three different genres of music, none of the three would find themselves saying, “What the fuck am I listening to?”

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A Belated Look: Mary J. Blige – Growing Pains

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I’ve been keeping Mary J. Blige’s latest album, Growing Pains (Geffen 2007), at the bottom of my record pile for months — unopened, unheard. I must confess this was not a matter of simple oversight, nor a case of procrastination.

I just didn’t want to hear it.

See, it’s borderline sac religious for a hip hop and R&B fan not to like Mary J. But despite her being a near-constant presence in the New York music scene for the last fifteen years, I’ve just never been able to get into the so-called “Queen of Hip Hip Soul.” She doesn’t have Whitney’s pipes — I’m referring to vocal cords here, people, not crack paraphernalia — Mariah’s range, Jill Scott’s soul-food soul, or India Arie’s earthiness. And she damn sure doesn’t have Janet’s dance moves. In fact, Mary J. Blige is one of the most awkward, out of sync dancers I’ve ever seen. She makes Dame Dash look like Savion Glover.

Now, I’m not saying she doesn’t have talent (she does), or charisma (definitely), or marketability (8x platinum, anyone?), but it has been her human vulnerability and open honesty (concerning her bouts with drugs, alcohol, and abusive relationships, not to mention being molested at age five) that has driven her record sales for the last ten years. Her music is real and it is genuine. And this is a good thing — I like that in an artist. But I’ve always thought Mary was…well, in a word: overrated. Historically almost all of her best songs have been collabos/duets: “Real Love” (Remix) with Biggie, “I’ll Be There For You/You’re All I Need to Get By” with Method Man, “Love Is All We Need” with Nas, “Back 2 Life 2001” with Jadakiss, “Family Affair” (Remix) with Jadakiss and Fabolous, and “911” with Wyclef Jean. Not to mention everything with Jay-Z. The list goes on.

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The Friday Writers’ Bloc: April 18th, 2008

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Download this week’s Friday Writers’ Bloc Playlist HERE

Michael-Bradley’s Picks

1. X – Nausea

I just ate a few tacos, so I figured I would pull out my anthem that I sing when I’m nauseous-Nausea. Along with bands like the Germs, X was part of the first wave of punk that found LA. Both those bands, as well as previously featured FEAR all were a big part of “The Decline of Western Civilization.” X had a real edge, but a lot of their stuff had plenty leftovers of New Wave dropped in. This is off their first album, Los Angeles, produced by the Door’s Ray Manzarek.

2. Bad Religion – White Trash (2nd Generation)

I was just having a discussion with a friend about the LA punkers- Bad Religion. Among kids our age, they’re most known for their poppy punk anthems that they’ve been putting out the past ten years on KROQ. It’s hard for many to believe that these guys were part of the first Hardcore movement in the states. But after examining their name and their iconic logo it’s no surprise. Their first album “How Could Hell Be Any Worse” was classic hardcore. Too bad they followed the album with “Into the Unknown”, a crappy prog-rock record that absolutely destroyed their punk cred. They came back afterwards, with “Back to the Known” in a form that is more recognizable now, but the hardcore was all gone. If you want to talk to the band, check out a UCLA Life Science lecture where you’ll find the lead singer teaching!

3. The Mae Shi – Run To Your Grave

Full of changing and unique DIY lighting, as well as frequent costume changes, these guys are great to see live. But their great on tape too. These guys’ run as a small time LA Smell band is on it’s last legs. I’m pretty certain they’re about to blow up at any moment. After featuring albums with 30 or so spastic 30 sec to 1 min explosions, they’ve settled down to more chewable 2-3 min songs. Their newest album “Hlllyh”, should be hitting the radio at any time. Going between 80’s 8 bit keyboards, chanting sing alongs, a little punk, and great chorus’s, it should be no wonder why they’ll do great everywhere. This song is catchy as hell, and already has a great video. My only question is, how are people going to receive their lyrics? After seeing them a bunch live, I’m pretty certain they’re being satirical, but we’ll see how everybody else receives it

Jonathan’s Picks

1. The Game – Big Dreams

I gotta come clean. I’m an East Coast guy. New York born and bred. Biggie, Jay-Z, Nas — those were my guys growing up. Sure I liked ‘Pac, Dre, and Snoop, and I even respected ’em. But they just never held the same water with me. After ‘Pac passed, Dre stopped making albums, and Snoop signed with Master P’s No Limit Records, West Coast Hip Hop was dead. (My apologies to Xzibit, but you don’t count in this category). But in 2004, my (forced) move to Los Angeles coincided almost perfectly with the arrival of a young, brash, fast-rising West Coast rapper called The Game. Ever since I heard The Documentary in 2005, I have anxiously anticipated his every release, and Doctor’s Advocate did not disappoint. In fact it merely succeeded in raising the bar to an unthinkable level for a sophomore album. The Game and Lil Wayne are by far the two most exciting and interesting young rappers in today’s hip hop community, each with a legitimate chance to become a legend in his own right, and eventually achieve O.G. status. “Big Dreams” is the first single from The Game’s upcoming album, L.A.X., which is due out this June. I can’t even pretend I’m not excited.

2. Rick Ross – The Boss

Since I’m being honest this week, I admit that after Rick Ross’ (undeniably hot, but semi-ridiculous) debut single, “Hustlin”” was released in 2006, I thought that would surely be the last we heard of the always meticulously unshaven drug dealer-turned rapper. Yet another “One Hit Wonder” going by the wayside, drifting quietly out into the waters of the Port of Miami. But clearly, I was very wrong. Ross struck Gold with his first album, and is aiming even higher on his second, the recently released and succinctly titled, Trilla, which debuted at number one on the Billboard 200, beating out both Snoop Dogg’s Ego Trippin’ and Fat Joe’s (aptly titled) Elephant in the Room. That’s serious business, as Ross took out two hip hop vets in one week. Though I wasn’t grabbed by Trilla’s first single, “Speedin'” featuring R. Kelly, I simply cannot get enough of Ross’ second single off the new album, “The Boss,” featuring T-Pain, and produced by Los Angeles-based hitmaker, Jonathan “J.R.” Rotem. I like bumpin’ this one as loud as possible, and I suggest you do the same.

3. Day26 – Got Me Going

Who the hell is Day26, you ask? Well that’s an excellent and fair question, since chances are they will never be very important or well known. Day26 is the newly formed R&B group from Diddy and his Bad Boy Records imprint, which came together on the fourth try, uh…I mean fourth season, of MTV’s Making the Band. It seems like it took a lot longer than that. (Note: Sorry to interrupt, but is that not the worst name for an R&B group you’ve ever heard? I really can’t think of anything worse. Day26?? It’s inane). Anyway, despite the awful name, and the overwrought production of the band itself, Day26 and its self-titled debut album hit the top of the Billboard 200 chart in its first week of sales. Wow. Okay then. “Got Me Going” is their first single off the album, and come to think of it, it’s their first single off anything at all. Are they any good? Well, you be the judge of that.

JustJake’s Picks

1. Jimmy Martin – Sophronie

Jimmy Martin was the king. He said so, and not too many people disagreed (well, maybe Bill Monroe). Martin was one of those larger than life types and this song showcases his rhinestone-suited swagger even as he sings about heartbreak and loneliness. That’s one of the beauties of bluegrass music: when it’s sad it’s still so fast that you’d never know it. Off of the Monroe tree, Martin played bluegrass right and is a great introduction for anyone not familiar with the genre.

2. Solomon Burke – That’s How I Got To Memphis

Solomon Burke is not related to Jimmy Martin but he is also a king. He performs in a crown, has a scepter, and sits in a throne on stage. The much underappreciated King of Soul released a mindblowingly soulful album (Nashville) in 2006 and this is the first track. Oh, and he’s been doing this for over sixty years, starting as a teenage preacher in Philadelphia, and somehow amassing like thirty kids along the way. When I saw him last year he couldn’t get out of his throne due to his tremendous size and age but still managed to hand out a red rose to every woman in the audience who wanted one, and probably could have bedded any one of them. Truly an amazing man and an amazing song.

3. The Million Dollar Quartet – Just a Little Talk With Jesus

Speaking of kings, Elvis and a few friends recorded this song in an impromptu jam session at Sun Records in 1956. You may have heard of his friends: Jerry Lee Lewis, Carl Perkins, and Johnny Cash. Most of the songs are filled with amazing banter and priceless stories like the one about being on the road with some guy named Chuck Berry. This is one of the few songs where the quartet plays uninterrupted. The quality isn’t anything to write home about but, come on, it’s Elvis, Jerry Lee Lewis, Carl Perkins, and Johnny Cash.

Carman’s Picks

Bob Dylan hat trick (been watching hockey highlights on SportsCenter) today from yours truly. Why? Well I’ve been inspired lately after watching Todd Haynes’ excellent I’m Not There for the second time and his recent Pulitzer Prize award. Oh yeah, and coincidentally you can tune in to my radio show this evening from 6-8 PST for a special Bob Dylan marathon at UCLAradio.com for our pledge drive. Give us your money!

1. Bob Dylan – Queen Jane Approximately

Quite possibly my favorite Dylan tune, nothing tops this tune for the sheer amount of vitriol that his drawl exudes in this song. Not even “Positively 4th Street.” It serves as a nice companion piece to “Like A Rolling Stone” on his magnum opus of Highway 61 Revisited. After the indignation and jeering of “Like A Rolling Stone,” he returns to the subject of the song with “Queen Jane Approximately” almost pointing and laughing while saying, “I knew you’d come crawling back.” Whether that “you” was Edie Sedgwick, Joan Baez, or his fans that abandoned him after proclaiming him as Judas, it doesn’t change the song one bit.

2. Bob Dylan – 4th Time Around

I think John Lennon took himself a little too seriously with “Norwegian Wood (This Bird Has Flown).” So seriously that he got a little upset when Dylan knocked off this little parody of it on his double-album monster of Blonde On Blonde. John, you should’ve been at least honored that he even acknowledged the damn song.

3. Bob Dylan with The Rolling Thunder Revue – A Hard Rain’s A-Gonna Fall (Live)

While I’m not entirely sold on the Rolling Thunder Revue performances of Dylan’s classic songs, this one was a standout to me on the Live 1975 set released in 2002 by Columbia. From a simple protest song came a reinvention of a Dylan classic that the carnival atmosphere of the tour turned into a riot of a performance that perfectly captured the leftover feelings of the conflict in Vietnam that had ended only months before the tour took off. The monstrosity of the conflict still loomed large in the minds of the West, and the anger and shame certainly did not die off.

Download this week’s Friday Writers’ Bloc Playlist HERE

Who the F**K is M. Pokora?

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At this point in time, that’s still a good question for most of us. Unless of course you happen to live in France. In which case you already know exactly who this guy is. And you’ve probably seen his nipples. Many times.

Huh?

Okay, let me start by saying it’s not an easy task to find a picture of M. Pokora (né Matthieu Totta, aka Matt Pokora, bka M. Pokora — something about lawsuits — don’t ask, it’s the French) with his shirt on. Kind of like Matthew McConaughey. The guy seems allergic to shirts. Or maybe it’s that shirts are allergic to him. Either way, he’s just that kind of, um, artiste, because what he really is…well, what he really was… is a French pop star. In fact, Pokora even got his pop start in 2003 on a dreadful Euro TV show aptly named, Popstars, which sounds like a gloriously hedonistic mash-up of American Idol and Diddy’s Making the Band: Part 47 on MTV.

In other words, just a level of awesomeness that us Americans cannot even fathom nor comprehend. (Oh well, our loss.)

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